Sir Galahad

david


So why did I spend last Saturday morning racing around on the tube system ending up in the basement of the Central School of Speech and Drama in order to assist Penny Francis, who is one of this country's foremost experts in puppetry, with problems she was having with WordPerfect and the concordance for an academic History of Puppetry that she is editing for a Polish colleague?

Answer - because she asked me. It was certainly not what I had had planned to be doing. And bear in mind that I had only met her once before at New Year at a party to which Keith took me in her home.

So why was I doing it? Well, I have this inalienable desire to help. Penny, in fact, referred to me as her Sir Galahad. Show me someone with a personal problem, ask for my help, describe a difficulty and I'm there, salivating like one of Pavlov's dogs. After all, other people's problems are so much safer than your own.

And OK this shows what a loving, caring, truly wonderful person I am but the down side is the way that I tend to put everyone else's needs before my own. Do I really have so little self-esteem that I feel that my well being should be subservient to everyone else's? Well, frankly, at times, I fear that the answer to this one is Yes.

I also seem to be incredibly approachable. People stop me in the street to ask me for help all the time.

Let me give you an extreme example. November 1989 I visit Köln for the first time. On the third morning, I leave my friend Chris's flat to go into the city solo and take the U-Bahn to the Hauptbahnhof. From there, I walk past the Dom towards the Römisch-Germanisches Museum and I'm approached by an American tourist who asks me the way to the railway station. I tell him. Of course, I can tell him. I've just come from there. It's the only place in central Köln to which I can direct him.

But why me? Why out of all of those people did he feel that he could approach me?

I sometimes feel that I have a big neon sign over my head that says This man will answer your every question. Feel free to ask him. Actually, this is untrue. Over my head is a big sign saying This man is gentle and accommodating and won't bite your head off. I just wish that it worked in bars.