Well, I have been ill. That much is certain.
The headline event was a chest infection. As I discovered after the event, there was a lot of this bug going around. The virus hit me full force just before Mothering Sunday in mid-March. I cancelled a visit to see my parents and spent the day either in bed or not far from it. I hardly slept that night. I coughed and coughed and sweated and sweated and then shivered and shivered and then coughed some more.
On the Monday, I felt really rough. I hadn't gone into school and had lain in bed most of the morning. This felt like something that I wasn't going to shake off lightly. I drove gingerly to the drop-in centre at Litherland Town Hall. I was told that I had a temperature and a chest infection and was prescribed antibiotics.
The following week, so far as I am concerned, was a write off. Apart from the fact that I was ill, I remember nothing about it at all. It is all coughing and sweating and shivering and sleeping. I listened to talking books, although I cannot tell you now what I actually listened to, and that was about all I was fit for. Television and music held no interest. Books were too complicated to read. Sudoku was intellectually impossible.
Luckily I have Ross. He prepared food and I ate. The one good thing from all of this is that I haven't lost a lot of weight the way you can with a bug such as I've had. If I'd been living on my own (as I well remember from yesteryear) I wouldn't have eaten hardly at all. And this was the main reason that Ross knew that I was really ill. Normally, I have a very hearty appetite. During that period, I picked at my food. Evening meals, I tackled in three separate 15 minute sessions where normally I would polish off the lot in 10 minutes.
On the second Monday, I got myself an appointment at my surgery and saw a locum. She was knew to the practice and didn't know where anything was. She listened to my chest, however, and told me that I was still wheezy and crackly. She prescribed more antibiotics and signed me off work for a week. I can't say that I did much more that week either but I did manage to get out to the shops a few times and I started listening to music.
By the time the following Monday came round, I was certain that my chest was clear but I just knew that I was too run down to go into work. Roland gave me some sage advice. He counselled that I should ask for more time off work. I demurred saying that I would have expected the doctor to advise this. Roland countered by saying that the practice has changed and nowadays doctors will only grant sick leave if you ask for it.
I got my appointment and saw another locum. He pronounced my chest clear but put me forward for a range of tests such as a chest x-ray at Litherland drop-in centre and blood tests at Netherton Health Centre. I waited for him to suggest further rest but the advice did not come and so I followed Roland's lead and requested it. No problem. He signed me off for a further ten days.
This took me past Easter. I was certainly glad of the time to rest. Whatever I tried to do by way of getting out of the house left me immediately tired and fatigued. Strength and stamina were lacking.
Even when I went back to work on the Thursday after Easter, I did very little and ended up going to bed by 8pm that first night. This told me that I was still only working at about 50% of full capacity. I cancelled meeting up with Linda and Mary that coming weekend. I got through the next week at work but I cancelled travelling up to Kendall to see Robert perform.
All in all, I've felt crap. It's really only been in the last week or so that I have felt anything like approaching par again. And when I see my doctor next week to get the results of the tests, I shall be asking if there is anything further needs to be done.
You see, I think that I have been ill for quite some time.
All through the cold weather, I put down my continuing tiredness down to the weather conditions.
All through the dark days, I put my disinclination to do things down to a low level of depression.
You see, I was ill with a head cold and a cough last November. At the time, I thought that I had done enough to get rid of it. I suspect now that I had merely suppressed the symptoms and that the virus just hung about in my lungs gradually clogging me up until I got so run down that it overwhelmed me.
I know that, as soon as I started with the first course of antibiotics, suddenly I could breath into parts of my lungs that I hadn't been breathing into for many months. No wonder that I was doing less and less. I was compensating for the fact that, whenever I did something, I felt out of breath.
The second locum that I saw also prescribed me a stronger inhaler for my asthma and that too has helped. I suspect that I need to review my asthma with my doctor. I may not have been taking it as seriously as I should have done.
Anyhow, I am feeling better. Simply adding stuff to this Journal is proof of that. What matters now is what I do with that feeling of renewed health.